Golden Queen

Trollius chinensis, (Globeflower) Golden Queen

My favorite color of yellow - saffron.  This color often represents sacrifice and salvation.  When I lived on the Upper East Side my bedroom curtains were this lovely color.  A few times a year the sun would rise and the light would reflect off the Bank across the alley from my bedroom.  My entire bedroom would fill with defuse golden light.  I would wake up early on Sundays, get an H&H bagel and take it to Carl Schurz Park. There I would watch people walk their dogs, and see tug boats work their way up the East River.

Those days that I woke up to golden light were some of my happiest moments of my life in Manhattan.  My heart would fill with peace, and I could rise above every little thing that came my way.  Even when a long-term relationship was dying, my golden light would buoy me, sustain me, convince me that I could be happy again.

I no longer have saffron curtains. But whenever I see this color it reminds me. I take a deep healing breath. I lower my shoulders and imagine tug boats persistently working their way against the current.